when i was a tween

she called one night yelling at my mom
for talking to a doctor, an imaginary psychiatrist
she thought they were plotting against her
this happened once before when they lived in Richmond

my grandfather woke once in the middle of the night
my grandmother had just gone for a late night drive
it was nothing to worry about
this was before i was born

my grandfather woke in the middle of the night
at 2am he went out to the garage and found my grandmother
sitting inside the car
it was running
my mother didn't understand why he hadn't looked for her sooner

i remember the first time i saw my grandfather cry.

one year earlier my grandparents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary
my dad went ice fishing with my dog, Buddy
that day Buddy fell through the ice and my dad jumped in after him
two men pulled them out

when my dad got home late my mom asked what had happened to him
she asked why he would risk his own life jumping in after the dog
my dad told her he did it for us, my brother and me

i remember the first time i saw my dad cry.