I am sitting on the toilet

I am sitting on the toilet with an upset stomach
because I ate pizza and drank beer this afternoon
and last night I ate at midnight because I got home
late because I was out learning that We should meet
to talk about photography really means We should
discuss our sexual histories for five hours and
by the way I may mention you to my gallery.
And then I ate at midnight because I got home late
and I decided also to drink some whiskey and smoke
as much weed as I had left because I don't know
what's happening to me anymore. Is this what it means
to be an artist? It's too haphazard. Then on the train
on the way home today my intestines just lit up
like a Christmas cactus. The bathroom is warm and stuffy
but I feel calmer. Sometimes music finds its way in
from downstairs or outside, never anything I recognize,
but this evening someone is listening to Gary Jules
singing Mad World (from the Donnie Darko sountrack)
and I would like to find out who it is.